thatneedslube: Also he always tops, and he always uses lube (merlin-arthur)
[personal profile] thatneedslube

I'd love to help you out, Bradley, but I have no idea what you're talking about. Is this a card game? Who tops in fic? Because if you're looking for stories where Merlin tops Arthur, I don't really have any of those.

Oooh, you're looking for which Merlin characters are best at what skill? Well, we're going to have to disagree with you here, Bradders, even though we know you mostly made this list because of your hardon for Percival.

  • Gaius: 100 keeping the magic a secret

  • Merlin: 100 being the most recognizably homosexual character so that even the generic knights know it

  • Sir Leon: 100 Badass Integrity

  • Gwaine: 100 Drunken Master

  • Percival: 100 Tickets to the Gun Show

But wait, we can expand that list.

  • Arthur: 100% not interested in women until affected by a magic spell

  • Morgana: 100 stabbiness power

  • Gwen: 100% should have run off with Lancelot in series 1

  • Male guest stars: 100% have a hardon for Arthur

Tell us your Merlin Top Trumps in the comments! You know, the ones you can't actually send to Bradley because you're a good person.
thatneedslube: Also he always tops, and he always uses lube (merlin-arthur)
[personal profile] thatneedslube

Promise you'll never stop being homoerotically in love with your co-stars. I love it so much. <3
stopitsomemore: (Default)
[personal profile] stopitsomemore
Yes? You're so tweaking after days of off and on days of DDOS attacks on Livejournal that you'll read anything? Good, read this open letter I am writing to you, Fandom.

Fandom, I know that a lot of us gravitate toward you in order to find balance in the annoyingly normish pallor of everyday life, but let it just be said here and now, this is not the way to do it:

This? This right here? This is not the right kind of attention you want to be drawing to yourself.

There are a couple of reasons this is incredibly gross and tremendously sad, chief among them being that this is the sort of thing that is mostly irreversible, your insurance sure as hell didn't cover this bullshit, and you look like a fucking moron. More than that, you make the rest of us look bad. You make Vulcans and elves look bad. This is on par with this action:

And also, this action:

So let's put this together in a handy flow chart for your decision making:

Thank you for your time.
stopitsomemore: (Default)
[personal profile] stopitsomemore
I don't know if everyone reads Henry Jenkins's very interesting Acafan blog, but if you're at all into the academic study of fandom and fandom's infrastructure, then I think it's worth a whirl once in a while. It lives in my RSS reader under "nerd," where it dutifully produces posts about remix culture and sometimes -- like today -- Henry Jenkins's feelings about feelings!

Two things collided over the past week for me as a loyal television viewer and I want to get them off my chest. I give fair warning that this is going to be a bit of a rant. There's almost no aca here and a hell of a lot of fan.

The first is that after watching House M.D. with some great pleasure for seven seasons, I am more and more facing the grim reality that it has more or less jumped the shark this season thanks to its frustrating and ill-conceived representation of the on-again, off-again love affair between House and Cuddy.

The second is that I have been more or less inhaling Castle for the past month or so, watching several episodes a night in true "can't eat just one" spirit, having somehow failed to discover it until its third season, and much of what has fueled my passion for this series has been its sophisticated handling of the relationships (all of them in their varied forms and contexts) between the central characters.

-- Source

Now there are a couple of things that are of particular interest to me in this post:

1. Someone fannishly inclined is still watching House?
2. You really didn't see that inevitable shitshow between Cuddy and House coming?
3. Ha ha ha oh my God, Henry, you adorable shipper.

No, but seriously, his is a good question: why aren't there a lot of committed relationships in media? Of the few that he mentions, Castle, despite its flurry of other delightful relationships, doesn't really count because as my Castle Watching Friends complain constantly, they haven't bagged it or tagged it yet, and White Collar is basically a walking talking PSA for functional polyamory pretending to be a USA series about "crime" and "stolen Nazi treasure."

My guess? Beyond the fact that people in TV land don't really know how to write it, I think we like the ride better than the conclusion. I'm totally stealing a line from a Barbara Streisand movie about how love and beauty, while not skin deep, aren't going to hurt you in your quest to bag a fellow professor at Columbia which maybe I watched like 48 times during my formative years -- anyway, I am stealing a line when I say, nobody talks about the after of the happily ever after, about Cinderella compulsively cleaning the castle after getting married.

But this is where I break with Jenkins: I'm not actually sure I want TV to portray a stable relationship. I like to think we don't use TV as a Idiot's Guide to life, and people will feel out the boundaries of their own big forever loves or comfortable relationships -- what we don't get out of ordinary life for the most part is the sweeping romance and the epic drama you can get away with in television. Plus, you know, fucked up people are more fun.

Or maybe I'm just still bitter about House.
thatneedslube: also fug hat (zq-jizz)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
It should be no secret to you Fangasmic readers that enjoy manips. Good ones, bad ones, hilariously awkward ones: hit me. I want them. I can never resist clicking. So when I found this amazing piece of art that is as close to a manip as a harlequin cover can get, you better believe I was a little bit in love.

One word: AMAZING.

It's part of a post on Girls Are Geeks about Rosalind's lifelong crush on Wil Wheaton. I get it, lady. I totally get it. When I was a kid watching Star Trek: The Next Generation I had a massive crush on Wesley Crusher (and okay, Riker, too, but he was a bit old for me).

And then he grew up and got married and decided he needed a more appropriate, modern family crest with a motto that speaks to us all: Don't be a dick!

He played an amazing comic book collecting legend on Numb3rs, has a hilarious recurring role as himself on The Big Bang Theory, runs a wildly successful blog, and is now some kind of highland laird come to sweep Felicia Day off her scantily clad feet.

thatneedslube: Also he always tops, and he always uses lube (merlin-arthur)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
I know, I know, all I do recently is post things from Bradley James' twitter, but have you been following him? The boy is sweeter than snails and puppy dog tails and apparently full of fanservice.

Let's talk about this image he posted tonight for a minute.

  1. Hell yes those knights are hot. Like super hot. And they're just casually posing for Bradley's twitter. God, every time I write that it sounds like Bradley has a vagina. Awkward.

  2. The only person who looks confused here is Rupert, and I think that's because Bradley is sitting in his lap. I mean, we all know Bradley thinks he is all that,

    but also that possibly Rupert is responsible for all viruses on the internet. That's mostly because Bradley doesn't understand how the Internet works and about 10% because he gets really flustered every time Rupert emails him anything.

    Poor Colin.

  3. Okay seriously check out those arms. HOTT.

  4. Most important of all: Gawaine has the most homosexual hair of all the knights, and I can't tell if that was the actor's choice for downtime (I'm sure he would say that "football" is a serious "sport" and he needs his hair out of his eyes, but let's be serious - the only people who take "football" seriously call it "football" instead of soccer) or if the people in hair and make up read a lot of Gawaine/Merlin >> jealous!Arthur >> Arthur/Merlin fan fiction and figured this was a nice way to gay him up for series four.

  5. Listen, I did my hair that way when I was in grades one and two.
thatneedslube: Danny, can't you see he's in love with you? (h50-hearteyes)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
I know, I know, but Twitter has just been full of gems lately.

We can only assume Scott Caan has finally snapped under the sexual onslaught that is Alex O'Loughlin constantly up in his personal space.
thatneedslube: Also he always tops, and he always uses lube (merlin-arthur)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
and in that Future, Bradley James destroys the internet. Here, let me show you exactly what I mean:

When I saw this my first thought was "Who gave Bradley James a PC? He should be on an iPad, for his own safety. ...but he probably plays a lot of flash games and wouldn't be able to figure out how to find porn on it."

A few minutes later:

Maybe a regular mac is a good compromise for him. Colin could show him how it works except I bet Colin uses Linux and DVORAK just to be pretentious. At least he'll be safer on it. But really, no one can give Bradley IT help over twitter. You probably have to just push him aside and take the mouse.

Aaaaand confirmed.

This is just precious. Like watching a dog run into a glass door over and over again.
thatneedslube: Also he always tops, and he always uses lube (merlin-arthur)
[personal profile] thatneedslube

That's right, Bradley took candy from a stranger and then ate it. And he didn't even know what the label said.

[personal profile] stopitsomemore: dumb as a box of hair. Seriously, that kid. He's lucky he's so attractive.

Because she would probably give him "candy" if she had half the chance.
thatneedslube: Also he always tops, and he always uses lube (merlin-arthur)
[personal profile] thatneedslube

I can never tell if Bradley James is being sarcastic or not. I just want to believe he loves watching ANTM as much as we do.
earthlogicpls: (Default)
[personal profile] earthlogicpls
It's such a terrifyingly short distance on the internet between this:

[personal profile] thatneedslube: What fandom is The Beginner's Guide to Sex in the Afterlife going to apply to?
[personal profile] earthlogicpls: Phantom Menace
[personal profile] damngirl: classy

And this:

Ewan McGreggor

Thanks a lot, Ewan. We'll be thinking about Obi-Wan riding his bike with his poodle, on his way home to Qui-Gon for some hot Force Ghost sex.
thatneedslube: (sherlock-peel)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
Awhile back we covered Yahoo's completely unsurprising news about Delicious Bookmarks. If you've forgotten, here's what happened: And news about who bought delicious and why it's a big deal for a little money )

Pros and cons in the comments, people. Let's break this down.
thatneedslube: What's not to love? (psych-hellsyeah)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
You might remember that previously we discussed the SyFy channel's cinematic (on the small screen) masterpiece, Sharktopus. Now obviously it must be nigh-impossible to top that work of incredible genius, but we would like to present one possibility:

Is it possible that DINOSHARK is a classier Sharktopus? We're not sure, as the trailer is not quite as impressive as the Sharktopus trailer, but fangasmic fans, we leave this one to you: call it. Dinoshark or Sharktopus?

stopitsomemore: (Default)
[personal profile] stopitsomemore
So you may have heard that Jason Momoa (whom I am sure most of you know as Ronon from SGA, because apparently outside of that, his sum total of reasons to be famous involve being Lisa Bonet's husband) is going to be in a film version of Conan the Barbarian. Aside from the fact that I burst into one of those hysterical laughing jags that is exclusively used to mask despair, I have been keeping track of this project -- mostly because apparently the other person who could have been cast in the role was Jared "Hi, I'm one half of the fandom where RPS has the higher moral ground!" Padalecki.


The point is. Now there's an official trailer.

I'm so sorry:

So in case you, unlike me, are too smart to click the play button on that because you think that probably it is so terrible it will drive you to histrionic madness (you're not wrong!) there are a few really marvelous things you need to know about this trailer:

• Having already not wanted to see this movie, this trailer has now elevated that sentiment to the astral plane, where it's cavorting with all the Snapewives who married him there.
• There is an amazing and even better, possibly unintentional sex thing in the actual fucking title card of this movie, where the sword hilts itself into the name, Conan, which makes my lizard brain think, "Wow, is this entire shitshow going to be about Conan being fucked? Even though he's a super badass barbarian?"
• But MOST IMPORTANTLY OF ALL, there is this line of dialogue from Jason Momoa: "I live. I love. I slay. And I am content." Yes.
thatneedslube: (dw-loveme)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
Do you know why, Fangasmic fans? Because some of our favourite TV shows are finally coming back!

If you're not watching these three shows, you should be. I'm assuming most of you are watching at least one. )

There you go, guys. And don't give me the excuse of having too many shows to watch already - we all know summer tv is a barren waste land of re-runs. You'll have the time.
thatneedslube: Also he always tops, and he always uses lube (merlin-arthur)
[personal profile] thatneedslube
Via gealach-ros on LJ, I think we all know that Bradley is wreaking havoc on reproductive systems world wide. And by that I mean I think I just got spontaneously pregnant looking at these photos. A few examples below - check out her LJ post linked above for the rest:

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