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[...] Hello, Fandom. Can We Talk?
Apr. 8th, 2011 08:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stopitsomemoreYes? You're so tweaking after days of off and on days of DDOS attacks on Livejournal that you'll read anything? Good, read this open letter I am writing to you, Fandom.
Fandom, I know that a lot of us gravitate toward you in order to find balance in the annoyingly normish pallor of everyday life, but let it just be said here and now, this is not the way to do it:
This? This right here? This is not the right kind of attention you want to be drawing to yourself.
There are a couple of reasons this is incredibly gross and tremendously sad, chief among them being that this is the sort of thing that is mostly irreversible, your insurance sure as hell didn't cover this bullshit, and you look like a fucking moron. More than that, you make the rest of us look bad. You make Vulcans and elves look bad. This is on par with this action:
And also, this action:
So let's put this together in a handy flow chart for your decision making:
Thank you for your time.
Fandom, I know that a lot of us gravitate toward you in order to find balance in the annoyingly normish pallor of everyday life, but let it just be said here and now, this is not the way to do it:
This? This right here? This is not the right kind of attention you want to be drawing to yourself.
There are a couple of reasons this is incredibly gross and tremendously sad, chief among them being that this is the sort of thing that is mostly irreversible, your insurance sure as hell didn't cover this bullshit, and you look like a fucking moron. More than that, you make the rest of us look bad. You make Vulcans and elves look bad. This is on par with this action:
And also, this action:
So let's put this together in a handy flow chart for your decision making:
Thank you for your time.
stopitsomemoreSo you may have heard that Jason Momoa (whom I am sure most of you know as Ronon from SGA, because apparently outside of that, his sum total of reasons to be famous involve being Lisa Bonet's husband) is going to be in a film version of Conan the Barbarian. Aside from the fact that I burst into one of those hysterical laughing jags that is exclusively used to mask despair, I have been keeping track of this project -- mostly because apparently the other person who could have been cast in the role was Jared "Hi, I'm one half of the fandom where RPS has the higher moral ground!" Padalecki.
Anyway.
The point is. Now there's an official trailer.
I'm so sorry:
So in case you, unlike me, are too smart to click the play button on that because you think that probably it is so terrible it will drive you to histrionic madness (you're not wrong!) there are a few really marvelous things you need to know about this trailer:
• Having already not wanted to see this movie, this trailer has now elevated that sentiment to the astral plane, where it's cavorting with all the Snapewives who married him there.
• There is an amazing and even better, possibly unintentional sex thing in the actual fucking title card of this movie, where the sword hilts itself into the name, Conan, which makes my lizard brain think, "Wow, is this entire shitshow going to be about Conan being fucked? Even though he's a super badass barbarian?"
• But MOST IMPORTANTLY OF ALL, there is this line of dialogue from Jason Momoa: "I live. I love. I slay. And I am content." Yes.
Anyway.
The point is. Now there's an official trailer.
I'm so sorry:
So in case you, unlike me, are too smart to click the play button on that because you think that probably it is so terrible it will drive you to histrionic madness (you're not wrong!) there are a few really marvelous things you need to know about this trailer:
• Having already not wanted to see this movie, this trailer has now elevated that sentiment to the astral plane, where it's cavorting with all the Snapewives who married him there.
• There is an amazing and even better, possibly unintentional sex thing in the actual fucking title card of this movie, where the sword hilts itself into the name, Conan, which makes my lizard brain think, "Wow, is this entire shitshow going to be about Conan being fucked? Even though he's a super badass barbarian?"
• But MOST IMPORTANTLY OF ALL, there is this line of dialogue from Jason Momoa: "I live. I love. I slay. And I am content." Yes.
[Day Jobs] Professional MPREG Furry
Dec. 9th, 2010 06:27 amearthlogicplsThere are jobs that seem too crazy to be true that you can actually do for a living. Like testing experimental aircraft. Or being a professional MPREG Furry.
What, you haven't heard about what is ostensibly the best job ever? A four-month old baby panda cub at Woolong National Nature Reserve in China needed good role models to help it grow up and be re-introduced into the wild, so obviously this job was created:
stopitsomemore: …oh my GOD BEST. JOB. EVER.
thatneedslube: Well, I wouldn't actually want it, but cute. though basically are they being paid to be furries? like...mpreg furries?
earthlogicpls: i have a worse question
thatneedslube: wow, is that possible?
earthlogicpls: do they do something to SMELL like pandas? because i think that's a bigger issue than looking like a panda
Probably the answer is yes, in case you were wondering.
What, you haven't heard about what is ostensibly the best job ever? A four-month old baby panda cub at Woolong National Nature Reserve in China needed good role models to help it grow up and be re-introduced into the wild, so obviously this job was created:
stopitsomemore: …oh my GOD BEST. JOB. EVER.thatneedslube: Well, I wouldn't actually want it, but cute. though basically are they being paid to be furries? like...mpreg furries?earthlogicpls: i have a worse questionthatneedslube: wow, is that possible?earthlogicpls: do they do something to SMELL like pandas? because i think that's a bigger issue than looking like a pandaProbably the answer is yes, in case you were wondering.
[twitter] David Hewlett, What?
Oct. 7th, 2010 07:38 amthatneedslube
The only reasonable explanation I can think of for David Hewlett having anything to do with Hellcats is putting money into Baz's college fund. And that's a super good reason to do something, but that doesn't mean anyone at FG is going to watch any episode of that show.
Wait, that's a lie. One of us might, but I think we can hold an intervention. I'll do my best to prevent that tragedy.
Oh my god, now we have a Hellcats tag. What have I done?!
thatneedslubeWow, it's been awhile since I have showered you with the delights I find trawling through Delicious, hasn't it? I can fix that.
( Be warned, this is, as usual, full of terribleness. )
You guys are so lucky our editor was here and made me remove a few things from this post. This is my entire backlog of delicious caps. Now I can start fresh with the blood of Sherlock fandom. Be excited.
( Be warned, this is, as usual, full of terribleness. )
You guys are so lucky our editor was here and made me remove a few things from this post. This is my entire backlog of delicious caps. Now I can start fresh with the blood of Sherlock fandom. Be excited.
thatneedslubeRest assured, Fangasmic fans, that someone here at FG has been working hard on making an epic post about how amazing the new BBC series Sherlock is. That's not what this post is about, though. No, while she's been slaving away over a hot laptop the rest of us have been obsessively watching, reading, and scanning the internet for new Sherlock fannish contributions and loving every second of it.
Sorry, maybe every other second of it, because there's a fair amount of WTFery in any given fandom, and while Sherlock is young it's certainly not immune.
( Shut up, you know you love this kind of shadenfreude. )
There you go, fandom. Terrible things for your Wednesday night / Thursday morning. I'm sure you really love me right now.
ETA 1: Two seconds after I made this post someone else posted fic about Lestrade in an abusive gay relationship and Sherlock and John save him by making their thing a threesome with him. Thanks, Sherlock kink meme.
ETA 2: WHY. These are Benedict's actual shoes that he actually owns. They are so sparkly even Zachary Quinto might worry about wearing them. Meanwhile here, wearing offscreen chucks or something similar he looks not only human, but attractive and not crazy. Just sayin'.
Sorry, maybe every other second of it, because there's a fair amount of WTFery in any given fandom, and while Sherlock is young it's certainly not immune.
( Shut up, you know you love this kind of shadenfreude. )
There you go, fandom. Terrible things for your Wednesday night / Thursday morning. I'm sure you really love me right now.
ETA 1: Two seconds after I made this post someone else posted fic about Lestrade in an abusive gay relationship and Sherlock and John save him by making their thing a threesome with him. Thanks, Sherlock kink meme.
ETA 2: WHY. These are Benedict's actual shoes that he actually owns. They are so sparkly even Zachary Quinto might worry about wearing them. Meanwhile here, wearing offscreen chucks or something similar he looks not only human, but attractive and not crazy. Just sayin'.