Happy Alcoholic Christmas!

[stopitsomemore]

(image via Politico via AP)



John "My Sons Are Just Very Close" Winchester


John Winchester, also known as Kansas's Parent of the Year going on 30 years and counting. Our favorite father figure who gives pre-teen boys sawed-offs in order to deal with the monster under bed, which as we all know now, was probably some sort of Freudian manifestation of Sam's burning need to bone his older brother slash mother figure. Nobody makes drinking Wild Turkey and then staggering around to hunt ghosts and/or date Izzy in Seattle and then dying sexier.

Nathan "I Am Not Drunk, I Am Always This Surly" Ford


The best part of Leverage, other than Eliot being constantly angry about everything, making time during the day to grow all his own food, and not needing sleep, is Nate Ford and his close, personal, religious and sexual relationship with alcohol. He started off the series sixteen sheets to the wind in an airport or something and then did awesome things like let Sophie take away his glass and then drink straight from the bottle while she wasn't looking. (Grifters, so judgmental.)

Lucille "THAT WAS YOUR FATHER'S SEMEN" Bluthe

Lucille Bluth: I'll be in the hospital bar.
Michael Bluth: Uh. You know. There isn't a hospital bar, Mother.
Lucille Bluth: Well, this is why people hate hospitals.

Bender "Fuck You Robots Can Totally Drink" Bender

Bender: Oh boy, I'm gonna drink till I reboot!

and

Bender: What kind of party is this? Theres no booze and only one hooker!

Although Bender is a robot, he knows exactly what is important in life, you know?

Bernard "This Coaster Is Delicious" Black


Also, in conclusion, Bernard Black. How do we describe Bernard Black. Technically, he's a bookshop proprietor, but really, he's a professional drunk, whose hobbies include misanthropy, smoking, and acting as a pioneer in the field of making wine popsicles.

Bernard: No one is willing to admit that wine doesn't actually have a taste.
Manny: Of course you can't taste anything, you smoke eighty bajillion cigarettes a day. What's that you're eating?
Bernard: Some sort of delicious biscuit.
Manny: It's a coaster.
Bernard: Is it? Are there any more?

Fittingly, Mythbusters is checking if the beer-and-liquor/hangover myth is accurate. To support them, whyareyoulikethis and I are conducting our own tests.